If you and your spouse have decided that it's time for divorce, and you have minor children, you'll need to focus on what's best for them. That doesn't mean you need to stay together for the sake of the children. However, it does mean that their needs should be considered in the plans that you make. To make sure that your children's needs are met during your divorce, here are four steps for you to take.
Create a United Front
It's never easy to tell children about divorce. However, the sooner you and your spouse share the news with your children, the sooner they'll be able to begin the healing process. Not only that, but if you and your spouse have been fighting, the sooner you tell your kids, the sooner they'll understand what the fighting has been about. When you tell your children about the divorce, it's important that you and your spouse create a united front. Sit down with your children together and let them know what your plans are. Created a united front will help your children understand that they're still important in your lives, and that you'll still both be there for them.
When parents get divorced, children often feel that the marital problems were their fault, or that they'll be losing a parent. To make sure that your children come through the divorce healthy and happy, you and your spouse will need to provide reassurance to them. Continue to spend time with your children. Although the time spent with them will now be with just one of the parents at a time, your children will know that their relationship with both of you will remain intact, even after the divorce.
Consider Family Counseling
If you and your spouse are striving towards effective co-parenting, that will continue past the divorce, it might be time to consider family counseling. Family counseling is a great way to build the foundation that will allow for effective co-parenting and family communication.
If you're in the process of a divorce, you may want to over-compensate with your children; spend more money on them, go on bigger adventures, or overlook their bad behavior. Unfortunately, overcompensation can be the worst thing you can do when going through a divorce. Once the divorce is final, and you're trying to resume a normal life, your children will continue to expect the additional money and lax family rules. Give your children the love and attention they need, but don't go overboard.
Now that it's time for a divorce, use the tips provided here to help your kids survive the process with their emotions intact. For questions concerning your divorce, or custody issues, be sure to speak to professionals such as Urech & Livaudais PC.